Inside The Thoughts of a Cutter: A Poem

The other day one of my students who used to cut herself, but hasn’t cut in several months, shared a poem with me she wrote that I thought would be beneficial to share.

I think it gives a quick glimpse into the mind of those who self-injure.

Although she and most of everyone else who was a part of her group I treated for self-injurious behavior have stopped cutting, many of them still fight with the urge to do it when they are faced with certain stressors.

With her permission, I share this poem that has no title.

Depressed and suicidal

Need to escape the misery

Not caring to continue this life

Blood loss has me weary

Scars show my painful past

As the stained blade opens up

Areas of my skin torn and scarred

To be a reminder of a dark past

Mind torn between love and hate

Will I ever be free?

Everyday is a struggle

To be free from this depression

Lost in darkness and misery

Puddles of dried blood stains

From every deep cut that is made

Full of depression and misery

Not worth saving this life of hate.

2 thoughts on “Inside The Thoughts of a Cutter: A Poem

  1. I can relate to her very much. I sometimes wish that i hadn’t cut, which has left many permanent scars. In addition it also feels like a daily battle for me and the urge to cut increases based upon my mood, how people are treating me, and stressful events. I wish her luck with her recovery!

    1. Thank you for reading and sharing. In recovery, it is always one day at a time. The urge may always be there, accept that, don’t beat yourself up over it, but that doesn’t mean you or she has to go back to cutting. The scars will fade and does that don’t will allow you to share your story and help others and/or remind yourself of how far you have come.I wish you luck in your recovery as well 🙂

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